Finding Bright

Finding Bright

As I looked out my window, all I saw was darkness.
To my left.
To my right
& when I gazed upwards to that glorious sky with the hope of finding bright,
I saw only a handful of stars, as if they too tired of the continuous noise, packed their bags, called it quits

& that’s when the coyotes piped in.

Those obnoxious thugs have been known to frequent this neighborhood every once in awhile and if I happen to spot them in the daylight ?
I find them to be an earthy, raw, elusive kind of beautiful.
But, a sunlit sighting is rare because coyotes love obscurity
& in the darkness ?
Those guys are eerie.
Downright eerie.

Their howl is angry, loud, irritatingly grinding
& sad.
And when they zero in and gluttonly finish up their deadly hunt of that wrong time, wrong place, innocent critter ?
The stillness that follows is absolutely sickening
& then …

I think about this world and wonder how we the people always and always and ALWAYS  take one step ahead and ten million steps back
& I cry.
I just flippin break down and cry.

You’ve sucker punched me again, Hate
& truth be told, I’m trying my darndest to understand because like those coyotes, your howl is angry, loud, irritatingly grinding
& sad.
So very, very sad
& the incredible sadness of that howl beckons me to try a little bit harder

& so, I will.

I’ll pick myself up and I will try.
I will seek and find that in between place where we can talk it out, mediate and strive to understand one another.

But, just so you know Hate, I refuse to get caught up and devoured in your ugly chase and hunt.
Those bullies in my back yard reminded me, just this morning, of the deafening silence that follows.


I Am My Feelings